Sat
Mar
1
got poisoned today by a rogue sea urchin while snorkeling at hanauma bay. my left hand had 7 holes in it and my whole back tingled for a while. nothing a few beers couldn’t take care of…
oh, and snorkeling in the bay was pretty amazing…
i also found this incredibly accurate representation of how hawaii was originally discovered and settled (see photo below).
the fact that the police hand out condoms to pimps and prostitutes (prostitution is 100% illegal here) would make you think that they are generally rather lenient with the laws around here until you run into an “Aloha Ambassador”. these people are not police, though they seem to wield a sword far mightier. dressed in thier bright green uniforms, ticket pad in hand, they will very willingly hand out $200 a pop tickets for jay-walking. the fear of these violation ambassadors is more widespread then you could ever imagine. if someone spots you crossing where you shouldn’t or when you shouldn’t, you will be yelled at, pointed at, and verbosely warned that you are treating in very dangerous waters and must get away as quickly as possible. there could be an ambassador of pain just around the bend, ears perked up at the slightest hint of a tire screeching or flip-flops flapping too fast. they are quicker than and have better hearing then lassie and should be avoided whenever possible. they eat pedestrian insubordiance for breakfast and are never fully satiated. i fear them, but they fear nothing…
Fri
Feb
22
let’s have a look at the 10-day forecast for honolulu, HI and burlington, VT. it’s seriously beginning to not make any sense to me why i don’t live in a more tropical climate year-round. it’s amazing here. i’m motorcycling and going to the beach every day and it’s in february and 80 degrees. using my $100,000 engineering degree, i’ve come up with an equation that proves i’m an idiot for living in a moderately cold climate.
it’s simple really, here’s the proof:
(average temp) x (population) = (average intelligence index)
using,
- 10-day temperature average for burlington: 30 degrees.
- 10-day temperature average for honolulu: 80 degrees.
- population of burlington: 38,889
- population of honolulu: 876,156
and calculating the results:
- for burlington: 30 x 38,889 = 1166670
- for honolulu: 80 x 876,156 = 70092480
therefore:
- people living in honolulu are more intelligent by a factor of 60
you can double check my math if you want to, but it’s correct. i’m sure of it.
